Story on Toxic Relationships
City: Los Angeles
One time after sex I turned my head the other way and soft tears started to come out of my eyes.
It takes two to tango. My ex-boyfriend and I had broken up, and I moved away after college with high ideals for myself. I didn't expect to miss him, so I was surprised when I did, and I didn't know what to do with those feelings.
A year and a half later he moved to the same city I was living in. Lots had happened in between; we’d tried dating again, his dad passed away, hearts were broken – enough that our history tarnished the relationship. But I still loved him and didn't want him out of my life, and I still hoped that we would get back together. We slept together for months and he would tell me he'd come around emotionally eventually, but he never did, and I held on.
It hurt so badly with him being emotionally distant that sex wasn't even good anymore. One time after sex I turned my head the other way and soft tears started to come out of my eyes. You'd think that would have been the end of that story, right? But it wasn't. We had a blow out, old issues came up and we decided to end it. It had me running so far from him I thought I'd never go back, I repressed the memory of him and swore to never think of him again.
A year into single life, I met a woman with whom I shared a crazy deep connection with and we started dating. Less than a year into this relationship I started having dreams of my ex-boyfriend that would haunt me into my waking hours, bringing up pains and emotions I hadn't dealt with, so I chose to end things with her in order to heal myself.
It's been a few years since then and I can say that I've been released of his energy; no more taunting dreams and when I think of him I feel at peace. I had been wanting to let go for a long time and was waiting for the release, so it feels good that we both let go of that bond and moved on.